A Conversation With a Seminarian

As our congregation (Trinity Evangelical Lutheran Church, Taneytown) thinks about our connection to the formation of new pastors within the ELCA, I reached out to a current senior at the Lutheran Theological Seminary at Gettysburg (LTSG). Kesley Fitting-Snyder is a member of the final class to graduate from that institution before it merges with the Lutheran Theological Seminary at Philadelphia and is reformed into United Lutheran Seminary. What follows is an interview, email-exchange style, about her experiences as a newly forming pastor.

Cris: Can we start with you sharing some information about yourself and how you ended up at seminary? Particularly helpful would be any information you can share about how your education has been supported by family, congregation, synod, ELCA (or not).

Kelsey: I grew up in Lebanon, Pennsylvania and was baptized and nurtured in the faith at Holy Trinity Lutheran in Lebanon.  The pastor who was at the congregation retired from the congregation after being there for 35 years, and it sort of sent my church into crisis because so much of their identity was centered around him.  So as a little girl I never remember seeing a female clergy, I did not know that was even an option for women, because my church only ever had male pastors.  It wasn't until we had our second interim in that transition period that we had a female pastor and I experienced a female pastor for the first time.

About two weeks after pastor Julia Heart was there, I read a lesson in church, and after the service she asked me if I was thinking about going to seminary.  I was 16 years old, and didn't even know what she was talking about, to be honest.  I just sort of let it go in one ear and out the other.  A few months later she signed me up for a discernment retreat for high school students at Nawakwa.  She didn't tell me about it until she did it and my Nana paid the deposit so I felt like I couldn't say no.  I was really involved in my church growing up; sang in the choir, played in bell choir, did different aspects of service leadership etc.  

I had applied early decision to Susquehanna University during my senior year of high school, and intended on majoring in psychology.  The summer before I started college I went on a mission trip with some other Lutheran churches in Lebanon to West Virginia to do a Habitat for Humanity build.  While on the retreat, I led a devotion in the morning or led a prayer (something like that), and both pastors on the retreat that week (who only met me that week) asked if I was thinking about going to seminary.  That is when I really felt the Spirit take hold of me and understood that this call was something bigger.  I ended up having great conversations with both those pastors that week, so I started my first year at SU with the intention of starting seminary. 

While at Susquehanna I was really involved with religious life on campus.  I added a Religion major to my psychology major, and was part of a Pre-ministry group, Lutheran Student Movement, and handbells.  My sophomore through senior year I served as the Deacon of Worship and worked for the chaplain's office. There were three deacons at that time who all had different responsibilities.  Mine at the time was to help lead and plan worship on Sunday Mornings and lead a Tuesday night Bible study.  My college years were really formative for me in the faith.  Not that I didn't learn much in Sunday School and confirmation, but when I went through they were using the same materials they used 30 years ago. For me it was really exciting to be able to question my faith, challenge it, and talk about it in an open with others who were encountering the same thing. 

I have been blessed that throughout my seminary journey I have been supported.  It is humbling to know that so many people have walked this road with me.  My home congregation is not in the best financial shape, but they do have people who donate to a fund twice a year and that money really goes to help by books and stuff like that.  Around the holidays the choir places a can on the piano that says "Kelsey's Can" and people throw some of their spare change in over the weeks.  I also received a small amount from Zion Lutheran in Manheim.  They have a special benevolence fund that is for a seminary student in the synod.  My tuition is covered in full by the ELCA since I am a full Fund for Leader Recipient.  I am truly honored and blessed to have been given the award by the ELCA because it reminds me that as I am learning and pursuing my education, it is not just for me, but for the future of the church.  It helps give me incentive to continue to want to do my best. 

Cris: Can you tell us a little about your seminary experience? What surprised you? Challenged you? Favorite class and why?

Kelsey: I think of the biggest things that surprised me was that I was expecting people to be similar to me, or have taken similar paths to seminary such as I did.  I did not know that going right from college to seminary wasn't really the norm. It was at one time, but not anymore.  So it was surprising to me to walk into my first class and be in a room of people who came from a variety of backgrounds, and a variety of ages.  Everyone's different perspectives and experiences are brought into each class session, and we learn from each other in that way.  I guess I was not anticipating my leadership and my learning to be shaped so much by those around me, but looking back on it, it was those people that I was in class with all the time, and the professors who shaped who I am as future leader of the church. 

This brings me to my next point, on what was challenging for me. I had been affirmed in my call since I was young, and I knew seminary was where God was calling me next out of college, and even though I was a good student I still questioned my gifts. I compared myself a lot to my classmates, which sometimes is okay because it helps one to do better, but for me it wasn't helpful because I questioned my own strengths and abilities.  This was something that through time and experience I learned to overcome.  I have learned to look at people's gifts and lift them up because they are different than mine.  I think as seminarians being in a somewhat competitive environment we all go through this to an extent and a lot of us work through it during Clinical Pastoral Education, or on internship. 

I have had many favorite classes in seminary, but if I had to pick just one I would say that it was my thematics class Salvation: Salvations.  This class explored the Christian understanding of salvation, in comparison with some of the major and minor world religions.  This class challenged me in a good way to try and think theologically about what it means to be a Christian in a pluralistic society.  For my final project I did a curriculum that explored music and how music plays a role in expressing the understanding of salvation in Christianity, Judaism, and Islam.  

Cris: That’s an interesting point you make about class demographics. It seems to keeps sliding back and forth. I was “second career” (although my first career as stay-at-home-dad wasn’t an official career) and about half my class was as well. It seemed to be shifting back to a “younger crowd” in the classes that followed us. I hope it continues to be a diverse group of students because we all have gifts to bring to the conversation and vocation.

Do you think the “competitive environment,” which some moved past better than others in my experience, is involved in some of the struggles we are having as a greater church? In other words, we need to be more cooperative and collaborative if we’re going to succeed (in my humble opinion). Is the seminary process helping us see that and live into it? As you move from seminary into vocation, what is your perspective on the road ahead for the ELCA, in particular, and the church in general?

Kelsey: From what I understand the average age of Seminary is in the mid to low 30s but that is the least represented age group on campus so it makes it interesting. I have been working in the admissions office since I came back from internship and the way it is looking like for Gettysburg's campus of what is to become ULS those different demographics will stay. 

Yes I definitely think it is within the nature of the church to be competitive with one another especially when so many are just struggling to survive (which is an interesting metaphor for some in Seminary who are doing the same thing). I think the church has put up a facade for so long that we have forgotten what it means to be real with one other. We are afraid to be vulnerable and so we put a mask over everything.  Church is supposed to be that place in society that you can go to be authentically you, yet (from my experience growing up) it was the place you needed to seem perfect so that others didn't judge you.

I think that carries into Seminary and how we act as seminarians. When I stopped trying to be what I thought others wanted me to be, “holier than thou,” and just trusted myself it made a huge difference. I want to be able to be comfortable with who I am in ministry and be human so that those in my church can be as human as they need to be. Once we can get over ourselves I think that is when collaboration will really start taking shape and we can build up and edify one another. I think the ELCA in the future as a real great opportunity for partnership in many aspects of the word. One thing I am excited about is ecumenical partnerships.  We aren't the only mainline protestants who are struggling and I am excited to see where our ecumenical partnerships lead. My apologies for rambling, but that is how I feel about it.  

Cris: What is next for you? Assuming you’re in the regular assignment process, what kind of emotion does it carry as you think about “wrapping up” your education and moving out into a parish? What do you think will be some of your challenges and opportunities as you continue your leadership journey?

Kelsey: My husband and I will be entering the assignment process in February.  While we did not simply check the box “open to all,” we are open to going a lot of different places across the United States. [candidates for ordained ministry consider carefully where they think God is calling them to serve and provide that information to the ELCA leadership that assigns candidates to regions and synods] If I had to pick my ideal location it would be a place similar to Lincoln, NE.  What I mean by that is a small, yet growing city, passionate about solving the problems of poverty and injustice within the community.  As far as a kind of congregation, I am really open to all different kinds, for me it is about the people, and I want to guide and lead people who are passionate about sharing and living out the Gospel.  I don't know what I am capable of yet, because I have only had my internship experience, but I am trusting the Spirit in this process.  

I have many emotions when thinking about the end of my time in seminary.  I think prior to internship the thought of going out on my own would have been more terrifying than exciting. But now, having had that experience, I know that I am ready.  I know there will be challenges, no congregation is perfect, but looking back I know that I have been well prepared to go out and serve God's people. A challenge that I know I will face when beginning my first call, wherever it may be, is trusting myself.  I am the type of person who second guesses, even if I think I am making the right decision.  So it will be really important for me to trust in my training, and trust in the gifts that God has given me.  I am excited to meet new people and begin ministry.  

As the church is always reforming I am looking forward to being part of that process.  I think we are going to see more opportunities for connecting with our greater communities rather than being so focused within the walls of our own buildings.  There are many ways that we can do church together, and receive God's grace and mercy, and I am looking forward to exploring those many possibilities.

We pray for Kelsey, her husband, and all her classmates as they continue on the path to ministry within the church. You can learn more about the seminary by speaking with Pastor Cris or going to www.ltsg.edu or www.newschooloftheology.info.